Yes, yes, I know you're not supposed to, but all week I've been busily counting my chickens. God willing, and the Creek don't rise, I should break even on my book at the University Book Store event on Wednesday. This is thrilling news because it means I can continue writing without gradually running the savings account to $Zero and jeopardizing the chances of my children getting a college education and Scott getting to retire before age 75.
Of course, it only makes me more desirous of throwing more money at publishing ventures. The sequel, the cupcake book, the YA novel? No, no, I promised myself I would try to shop the YA one around because I'd supposedly already gotten my publishing impatience out of my system.
But there are so many books to write! I'm loving AGE OF WONDER by Richard Holmes, a history of science book set in the Romantic era, but while I read I'm simultaneously dreaming of writing a historical fiction about Joseph Banks' dumped fiancee or Caroline Herschel.
Anyhow, thank you for your support, my dear readers.
Tuesday, September 29, 2009
Friday, September 25, 2009
Drama in Real Life
Trying to remember--was that the name of a monthly section in Reader's Digest? I think it was usually some kind of mini-disaster with an act of heroism to save the day.
Here, straight from the Dudley household is the morning's unfolding drama:
Son: [stomping downstairs and around the house] Where's my library book???!!!!
Mom: I don't know. Did you put it in your backpack?
S: NO!!!!! [now flinging things about as he looks]
Mom: [helps look] Did you turn it in ahead of time? Did you take it upstairs to read? Did your sister read it?
S: NO!! No no no! [stomping. Finds it under a pile of his own papers and sheepishly puts it in his backpack.] [Then, when all seems well, he starts tearing around again.] I didn't do my reading homework!!!!!
M: Well, write it down now.
S: But I need to read an hour!!!!
M: Why don't you write down the reading you did this weekend, then?
S: But that was for last week!
M: No, it was the weekend, so you can write it down for this week.
S: [to whom everything is black and white] No, that's LYING!!!!!
[Mom struggles a few more minutes to persuade him. He finally writes down the comic books he read over the weekend, and sits down to eat, all the while making grumping, whining noises. A few moments later, he hurls the milk container lid across the kitchen in frustration.]
Stay tuned until next week. Will the son overcome his low blood sugar and get his act together, or will his mother wring his neck before this can happen? You'll only know if I don't show up on your evening news...
Here, straight from the Dudley household is the morning's unfolding drama:
Son: [stomping downstairs and around the house] Where's my library book???!!!!
Mom: I don't know. Did you put it in your backpack?
S: NO!!!!! [now flinging things about as he looks]
Mom: [helps look] Did you turn it in ahead of time? Did you take it upstairs to read? Did your sister read it?
S: NO!! No no no! [stomping. Finds it under a pile of his own papers and sheepishly puts it in his backpack.] [Then, when all seems well, he starts tearing around again.] I didn't do my reading homework!!!!!
M: Well, write it down now.
S: But I need to read an hour!!!!
M: Why don't you write down the reading you did this weekend, then?
S: But that was for last week!
M: No, it was the weekend, so you can write it down for this week.
S: [to whom everything is black and white] No, that's LYING!!!!!
[Mom struggles a few more minutes to persuade him. He finally writes down the comic books he read over the weekend, and sits down to eat, all the while making grumping, whining noises. A few moments later, he hurls the milk container lid across the kitchen in frustration.]
Stay tuned until next week. Will the son overcome his low blood sugar and get his act together, or will his mother wring his neck before this can happen? You'll only know if I don't show up on your evening news...
Wednesday, September 23, 2009
Note to Self: Sign Up for Drawing
I've figured out the gift I wish I had: illustration.
A friend has commissioned a children's picture book from me (the writing part of it, clearly), and I'm finding it rather frustrating to do only half a book. You could even argue that the illustrations in a children's picture book are 75%, since most picture books can survive a somewhat lame story if the pictures are glorious.
Illustrators also make BANK. I'm talking $150 per illustration, if the illustrator is under the age of 7 and still doing stick figures, up to $500+ per illustration if the person actually has credits on the resume. MARGO AND THE MAGIC CUPCAKES will require upwards of 27 illustrations. Meaning, a low end of $4,050 for the 7-year-old to put in his 529, and up to $13,500 for an adult who has done more than line drawings of her immediate family. Sigh.
Any illustrators out there? Willing to do line drawings and be low-balled to get your name out there? Then you too can charge $300 per illustration on your next book...
A friend has commissioned a children's picture book from me (the writing part of it, clearly), and I'm finding it rather frustrating to do only half a book. You could even argue that the illustrations in a children's picture book are 75%, since most picture books can survive a somewhat lame story if the pictures are glorious.
Illustrators also make BANK. I'm talking $150 per illustration, if the illustrator is under the age of 7 and still doing stick figures, up to $500+ per illustration if the person actually has credits on the resume. MARGO AND THE MAGIC CUPCAKES will require upwards of 27 illustrations. Meaning, a low end of $4,050 for the 7-year-old to put in his 529, and up to $13,500 for an adult who has done more than line drawings of her immediate family. Sigh.
Any illustrators out there? Willing to do line drawings and be low-balled to get your name out there? Then you too can charge $300 per illustration on your next book...
Monday, September 21, 2009
Read It or Not
The Read It or Not book club holds the longevity record hands-down, among book clubs I've been visiting. They've been meeting for sixteen years, although the newbie of the group has been attending a mere fourteen. They meet whenever they meet (the next time will be January 2010 (!) for Rudyard Kipling's KIM), so I felt flattered to make the docket so speedily.
My own book club tries to match the evening's food to the book's setting or themes, but the hostess of Read It or Not went one further: she served up the meal from the first Open House in MOURNING BECOMES CASSANDRA, down to the margaritas and Spanish rice! When another guest brought tabbouleh, Sara thought it only fitting, since that evening's meal also became a "global mishmash." After dinner we even played Charades around a set-up Scrabble board, in honor of all the game-playing in the book.
Sticking so closely to themes might rule some books out, in the future. They reminisced about the time they read William Manchester's A WORLD LIT ONLY BY FIRE, dining by candle light and eating only with their hands and one fork. (I didn't quite follow that, since that is how I generally eat--at least in terms of utensils. I also have that execrable habit--according to Oprah--of pushing food onto my fork with my finger, rather than using a knife.)
I wonder how Read It or Not would have handled David Benioff's CITY OF THIEVES, with its cannibalism and "library candy" (i.e., snacking on glue from book bindings). And it remains to be seen what we'll serve up for this month's BRAIN RULES. Sweetbreads, anyone? Seconds on the head cheese?
My own book club tries to match the evening's food to the book's setting or themes, but the hostess of Read It or Not went one further: she served up the meal from the first Open House in MOURNING BECOMES CASSANDRA, down to the margaritas and Spanish rice! When another guest brought tabbouleh, Sara thought it only fitting, since that evening's meal also became a "global mishmash." After dinner we even played Charades around a set-up Scrabble board, in honor of all the game-playing in the book.
Sticking so closely to themes might rule some books out, in the future. They reminisced about the time they read William Manchester's A WORLD LIT ONLY BY FIRE, dining by candle light and eating only with their hands and one fork. (I didn't quite follow that, since that is how I generally eat--at least in terms of utensils. I also have that execrable habit--according to Oprah--of pushing food onto my fork with my finger, rather than using a knife.)
I wonder how Read It or Not would have handled David Benioff's CITY OF THIEVES, with its cannibalism and "library candy" (i.e., snacking on glue from book bindings). And it remains to be seen what we'll serve up for this month's BRAIN RULES. Sweetbreads, anyone? Seconds on the head cheese?
Friday, September 18, 2009
Riley
I get asked questions about writing the book, such as how I came up with various plot points or how I write, and I hope I'm not making up the answers, but I might be... Isn't it supposed to be true that, after telling a lie enough times, even you get confused as to whether or not it's true? (BTW, and forgive this disjointed post, just read a wonderful book in two days called PROVENANCE by Laney Salisbury and Aly Sujo. All about a con man who passes forgeries of modern art. Talk about a good liar!) But this group had a new one: "Which of the characters was your favorite?" I have blogged before on how all the characters, even the dislikeable ones, become dear to me, but it was fun to have a chance to mention Riley.
Riley, one of Cass's co-workers at Free Universe, appeared fully-formed out of nowhere, and he became a place to insert all my favorite nerdy bits, including allusions to my failed Jeopardy! bid, the Battlestar Galactica references, and an old joke from my husband's college ministry years ago. Riley first came on the scene in the chapter where he criticizes Cass's Antarctica work, but when I had to go back and flesh out the chapter where she lands the job, it was a joy to give him more air time.
When I cast the movie version in my head, Riley is always Jack Black. So if Jack Black's agent ever reads this blog, and Jack would like to make $50, please do call.
Wednesday, September 16, 2009
Balancing the Books
"I would have liked to have seen characters that were a bit more multi-dimensional. The maids depicted here were for the most part without failing, their white female employers almost universally despicable." This last sentence comes from an Amazon review of THE HELP by Kathryn Stockett, the latest "It" book, if you've been hiding under a literary rock. In it a younger white woman explores the stories of the black women who serve the establishment.
Mr. Goldengate, the reviewer, I think you're on to something. For so many years, literary depictions of non-whites, particularly blacks, Jews, and Native Americans, have been so squirmworthy to modern eyes that contemporary writers and filmmakers and what-have-you now feel compelled to balance the books. Hence the proliferation of faultless blacks, Jews, Native Americans, gays, and so on, at least in white writings and productions. Need a role model? Judge? Spirit-guide? Inspiration? God? Black is the new white. Think THE SHACK, THE SECRET LIFE OF BEES, BRUCE ALMIGHTY, THE SOLOIST.
Not that the change can't be refreshing.
Scott was re-reading HUCKLEBERRY FINN for upcoming Literary Night and absolutely writhing over the whole race issue--he'd forgotten how incredibly uncomfortable some passages about Jim are. Then there was the time on one of our early dates when we went to see CIMARRON (1931) at the old-time movie theater, only to gape at each other in shock when Yancy Cravat turns to a young black servant boy (the Help) and says, "Look at those watermelons, Isaiah!" and Isaiah makes giant vaudevillian eyes at them. Eeks! Really?
Or reading LITTLE HOUSE ON THE PRAIRIE to the kids and hearing Ma wax antagonistic toward the Indians. Cut her some slack--they ate the cornmeal, dang it! Still, I could breathe more easily reading them CADDIE WOODLAWN's comparatively post-Civil-Rights friendship with "Indian Jim."
Having gone to college in the politically-correct era, I might fidget and cringe my way through certain historical works, but never would I suggest they be deleted from the canon. As long as there have been people they have drawn distinctions between themselves and others for whatever reasons--we've just stopped wanting to admit it. Race is no longer acceptable as a distinction, of course, but economic class and educational class are still fair game--note the popularity of the "People of Wal-Mart" site.
Anyhow, it'll be nice when the books are all balanced, and we can go back to acknowledging that folks are folks, and you have to take them--no matter the color of their skin--warts and all.
Mr. Goldengate, the reviewer, I think you're on to something. For so many years, literary depictions of non-whites, particularly blacks, Jews, and Native Americans, have been so squirmworthy to modern eyes that contemporary writers and filmmakers and what-have-you now feel compelled to balance the books. Hence the proliferation of faultless blacks, Jews, Native Americans, gays, and so on, at least in white writings and productions. Need a role model? Judge? Spirit-guide? Inspiration? God? Black is the new white. Think THE SHACK, THE SECRET LIFE OF BEES, BRUCE ALMIGHTY, THE SOLOIST.
Not that the change can't be refreshing.
Scott was re-reading HUCKLEBERRY FINN for upcoming Literary Night and absolutely writhing over the whole race issue--he'd forgotten how incredibly uncomfortable some passages about Jim are. Then there was the time on one of our early dates when we went to see CIMARRON (1931) at the old-time movie theater, only to gape at each other in shock when Yancy Cravat turns to a young black servant boy (the Help) and says, "Look at those watermelons, Isaiah!" and Isaiah makes giant vaudevillian eyes at them. Eeks! Really?
Or reading LITTLE HOUSE ON THE PRAIRIE to the kids and hearing Ma wax antagonistic toward the Indians. Cut her some slack--they ate the cornmeal, dang it! Still, I could breathe more easily reading them CADDIE WOODLAWN's comparatively post-Civil-Rights friendship with "Indian Jim."
Having gone to college in the politically-correct era, I might fidget and cringe my way through certain historical works, but never would I suggest they be deleted from the canon. As long as there have been people they have drawn distinctions between themselves and others for whatever reasons--we've just stopped wanting to admit it. Race is no longer acceptable as a distinction, of course, but economic class and educational class are still fair game--note the popularity of the "People of Wal-Mart" site.
Anyhow, it'll be nice when the books are all balanced, and we can go back to acknowledging that folks are folks, and you have to take them--no matter the color of their skin--warts and all.
Monday, September 14, 2009
Power of Story
Yesterday a student from Eastside Academy spoke in church. Eastside Academy is the alternative high school for at-risk youth housed at First Presbyterian Church of Bellevue which inspired Camden School in MOURNING BECOMES CASSANDRA. You need to know that, whenever one of these students stands up to speak to our congregation, they get the rock star treatment: standing ovations, tears, cheering. All that's missing is the mosh pit and some underwear thrown on the stage.
And it's all deserved! Whoever heard such great stories? Adversity like you wouldn't believe, and then, by the grace of God and with EA's help, the gradual, painful, effortful overcoming of adversity. Plenty of people twice and thrice their age haven't managed to get back on their feet and have in fact become quite comfy lying on the ground, completely rolled over by life.
Hearing such a testimony again just made me wish I'd gone into even greater depth with the whole Nadina business in MBC (although, dang it, the thing was already, as you know, the completely-unacceptable, hideously-unwieldy-first-novel length of 130,000 words).
If that aspect of the story interested you, do check out www.eastsideacademy.org for information on ways to volunteer at the school: mentoring as Cass did, volunteering in the classroom, donating to the Oct 24 auction, attending the auction, and so on. In our new church digs, EA now has capacity for 45 students, and they're already at 30-something, so they could use the extra help!
And it's all deserved! Whoever heard such great stories? Adversity like you wouldn't believe, and then, by the grace of God and with EA's help, the gradual, painful, effortful overcoming of adversity. Plenty of people twice and thrice their age haven't managed to get back on their feet and have in fact become quite comfy lying on the ground, completely rolled over by life.
Hearing such a testimony again just made me wish I'd gone into even greater depth with the whole Nadina business in MBC (although, dang it, the thing was already, as you know, the completely-unacceptable, hideously-unwieldy-first-novel length of 130,000 words).
If that aspect of the story interested you, do check out www.eastsideacademy.org for information on ways to volunteer at the school: mentoring as Cass did, volunteering in the classroom, donating to the Oct 24 auction, attending the auction, and so on. In our new church digs, EA now has capacity for 45 students, and they're already at 30-something, so they could use the extra help!
Friday, September 11, 2009
Be Edified
Women at the Well starts up again next week, the Bible study/service group I co-lead which is entering its sixth year, I think. This year we're doing the Gospel of John, and I've been re-reading Thomas Cahill's DESIRE OF THE EVERLASTING HILLS for background. Really a wonderful book--his humor and scholarship and thoughtfulness bring everything to life. He covers, as the cover says, the world before and after Jesus.
My co-teachers and I get asked every year for a book list, and I have to confess I don't read many overtly edifying books. Despite being a pastor's wife, I've never slept with MERE CHRISTIANITY under my pillow, though the kids and I are re-reading THE LION, THE WITCH AND THE WARDROBE together, and we listened to a semi-awful production of THE SILVER CHAIR on tape on our last trip back from Richland. (Speaking of that trip, we re-listened to the BBC WINNIE-THE-POOH I told you about and made the astonishing discovery that Piglet is Moaning Myrtle! I repeat: Piglet is Moaning Myrtle. If that doesn't get you to run out and get it from the library, I don't know what will. Moaning Myrtle (a.k.a. Jane Horrocks) also showed up in the SHAKESPEARE RETOLD series in the TAMING OF THE SHREW update. I don't generally recommend those because I prefer my Shakespeare straight, but that one wasn't bad.)
If you insist on being edified, I also like N. T. Wright's SIMPLY CHRISTIAN and most of Dallas Willard's THE DIVINE CONSPIRACY (couldn't get through RENOVATION OF THE HEART) and Henri Nouwen's LIFE OF THE BELOVED and Philip Yancey's PRAYER. I thought the anthology DEVOTIONAL CLASSICS was a lovely introduction to Christian writers across history.
Have any favorites you'd like to share?
My co-teachers and I get asked every year for a book list, and I have to confess I don't read many overtly edifying books. Despite being a pastor's wife, I've never slept with MERE CHRISTIANITY under my pillow, though the kids and I are re-reading THE LION, THE WITCH AND THE WARDROBE together, and we listened to a semi-awful production of THE SILVER CHAIR on tape on our last trip back from Richland. (Speaking of that trip, we re-listened to the BBC WINNIE-THE-POOH I told you about and made the astonishing discovery that Piglet is Moaning Myrtle! I repeat: Piglet is Moaning Myrtle. If that doesn't get you to run out and get it from the library, I don't know what will. Moaning Myrtle (a.k.a. Jane Horrocks) also showed up in the SHAKESPEARE RETOLD series in the TAMING OF THE SHREW update. I don't generally recommend those because I prefer my Shakespeare straight, but that one wasn't bad.)
If you insist on being edified, I also like N. T. Wright's SIMPLY CHRISTIAN and most of Dallas Willard's THE DIVINE CONSPIRACY (couldn't get through RENOVATION OF THE HEART) and Henri Nouwen's LIFE OF THE BELOVED and Philip Yancey's PRAYER. I thought the anthology DEVOTIONAL CLASSICS was a lovely introduction to Christian writers across history.
Have any favorites you'd like to share?
Wednesday, September 9, 2009
In a Word
Have you noticed the trend in one-word titles? They were all over the place at the writers' conferences I went to this year, as well as all over the bookshelves. I'm thinking of BONK, SPOOK, STIFF, CRANK, MARKED, TWILIGHT, ECLIPSE, OUTLIERS, NURTURESHOCK (cheating--a fake compound word), CATASTROPHE, COLLAPSE, and so on. Kelley Armstrong specializes in terse titling. Witness her series: BITTEN, BROKEN, HAUNTED, STOLEN. You may want to check her website for any contests to help her think of the next ten books. Maybe SCORCHED. Or PILLAGED. Or FLAYED. And then she could branch out into a Young Adult series: SNUBBED or REJECTED or DUMPED or PIMPLED.
There are benefits to not naming your book THE GUERNSEY LADIES LITERARY AND POTATO PEEL PIE SOCIETY. For instance, all the text fits on the cover and spine in huge lettering. For another, men might buy your book. MOURNING BECOMES CASSANDRA is probably too much of a mouthful as well, but at least a handful of people think I've written MOURNING BECOMES ELECTRA, and that's got to be good for my reputation.
Read any good one-word titlers lately?
There are benefits to not naming your book THE GUERNSEY LADIES LITERARY AND POTATO PEEL PIE SOCIETY. For instance, all the text fits on the cover and spine in huge lettering. For another, men might buy your book. MOURNING BECOMES CASSANDRA is probably too much of a mouthful as well, but at least a handful of people think I've written MOURNING BECOMES ELECTRA, and that's got to be good for my reputation.
Read any good one-word titlers lately?
Monday, September 7, 2009
Happy Labor Day!
My oldest even asked me what Labor Day was last night. How does one explain Labor Day to kids? At least Bellevue's teachers went on strike last fall. Even when they weren't educating they were educating. How about that.
Friday, September 4, 2009
Another Fan Lost
A writer friend's new book has come out, and she discovered this blogger's review, here excerpted for your reading pleasure:
"I did have a couple of problems with the book. The main character, though a Christian, drank alcoholic beverages, and even went to a bar. I know a lot of Christians are ok with that, and I have heard the arguments, but there are also a lot of Christians who do not drink, and believe it is wrong. I feel it is something a Christian author should avoid in their books. It is a big turn off for me when I run into it in a book, and I am sure there are others who feel the same way.
"Oliver had two women throwing themselves at him, both trying to seduce him. I know it was a fiction book, but a real Christian man should have walked away from both women under the circumstances, so I think that gives a wrong message about dating relationships."
Unchristian confession: I had a wicked urge to Comment on his post. Something along the lines of, "I just put down my beer to read your blog, and boy, am I glad I did! I think we share a lot of the same values. I'll bet you're a huge Anne LaMott fan--I've got two tickets to go hear her speak and would love to go with you. BTW, your picture is HOT. HOT HOT HOT!"
Instead, I gave in to the equally unchristian urge to poke fun at him on my blog. Something tells me I should not send this man a review copy of MOURNING BECOMES CASSANDRA. Did I mention that, at one of the book parties in California, when I talked about how MBC's 130,000 word count was too high for a first novel (according to agents, first novels should come in around 80,000-95,000), one woman suggested, "Have you thought about cutting out the cuss words?" There go the chapters purely devoted to the f-word, I guess.
Off to do a little prayer and penance...
"I did have a couple of problems with the book. The main character, though a Christian, drank alcoholic beverages, and even went to a bar. I know a lot of Christians are ok with that, and I have heard the arguments, but there are also a lot of Christians who do not drink, and believe it is wrong. I feel it is something a Christian author should avoid in their books. It is a big turn off for me when I run into it in a book, and I am sure there are others who feel the same way.
"Oliver had two women throwing themselves at him, both trying to seduce him. I know it was a fiction book, but a real Christian man should have walked away from both women under the circumstances, so I think that gives a wrong message about dating relationships."
Unchristian confession: I had a wicked urge to Comment on his post. Something along the lines of, "I just put down my beer to read your blog, and boy, am I glad I did! I think we share a lot of the same values. I'll bet you're a huge Anne LaMott fan--I've got two tickets to go hear her speak and would love to go with you. BTW, your picture is HOT. HOT HOT HOT!"
Instead, I gave in to the equally unchristian urge to poke fun at him on my blog. Something tells me I should not send this man a review copy of MOURNING BECOMES CASSANDRA. Did I mention that, at one of the book parties in California, when I talked about how MBC's 130,000 word count was too high for a first novel (according to agents, first novels should come in around 80,000-95,000), one woman suggested, "Have you thought about cutting out the cuss words?" There go the chapters purely devoted to the f-word, I guess.
Off to do a little prayer and penance...
Wednesday, September 2, 2009
Maps or Sex?
Up here in Bellevue, the outdoor swimming pool season is almost history, but some other parent-loungers and I managed to get in a last book discussion. Laura came over and checked out my David McCullough's THE GREAT BRIDGE and said, "I don't do books that have more maps than sex." Just FYI, if you've never read any McCullough (JOHN ADAMS, THE PATH BETWEEN THE SEAS, THE JOHNSTOWN FLOOD, etc.), his books always feature lots of maps and zero sex. And I love them. Find them gripping.
Not that sex books aren't gripping, in a bug-your-eyes-out, hide-it-if-the-kids-come-around kind of way. Another friend was reading MARKED, a YA vampire novel(surprise!) by a mother-daughter pair, and there was way more sex than maps in that one. To think I forbade my ten-year-old reading TWILIGHT until she was 10 1/2! (Wanted to make it 15, but had to cave when her older cousin read it at 10 1/2...) No MARKED for her until she's at least 25 or married. Whew! Clearly, some mothers and daughters are not only comfortable reading the stuff, they can even collaborate on dreaming up oral sex scenes. Call me uptight...
But how uptight can I be? Spent a couple hours yesterday reading and then skimming a book that was 100% sex and 0% maps, Mary Roach's BONK. Like her previous books, STIFF and SPOOK, there are some fascinating bits, some hilarious bits, and then lots to skim. For example:
Fascinating bit: Some 1932 researches studied what raises and lowers a person's heart rate and discovered that "'defecating' can briefly bring your heart rate down by eight beats per minute." Who knew? Forget yoga, folks. Just eat more fiber.
Hilarious bit: "Watson's fame, in no small part, derives from his willingness to study human behavior in a laboratory setting. Most of his subjects were children, most notably Little Albert (no relation to Fat), the eleven-month-old boy in whom he conditioned a fear of white rats."
FYI, Roach's book is not one you can leave lying around the house, and I was almost afraid to have it on my library checkout record. I am a pastor's wife, after all. But I can only read so much titillating, guilty-pleasure material before returning to my map books. There are no fake-penis cameras in McCullough, but the Brooklyn Bridge isn't without charm. Who knew that Washington Roebling, the engineer who headed up its construction, had something of a Forrest Gump career in the Civil War, johnny-on-the-spot at many key battles? For a New York and Civil War fan like me, this is delicious. Why read about how the Roeblings got their kids if we can talk about how WR got the bends, deep beneath the East River?
How about you? Maps or sex?
Not that sex books aren't gripping, in a bug-your-eyes-out, hide-it-if-the-kids-come-around kind of way. Another friend was reading MARKED, a YA vampire novel(surprise!) by a mother-daughter pair, and there was way more sex than maps in that one. To think I forbade my ten-year-old reading TWILIGHT until she was 10 1/2! (Wanted to make it 15, but had to cave when her older cousin read it at 10 1/2...) No MARKED for her until she's at least 25 or married. Whew! Clearly, some mothers and daughters are not only comfortable reading the stuff, they can even collaborate on dreaming up oral sex scenes. Call me uptight...
But how uptight can I be? Spent a couple hours yesterday reading and then skimming a book that was 100% sex and 0% maps, Mary Roach's BONK. Like her previous books, STIFF and SPOOK, there are some fascinating bits, some hilarious bits, and then lots to skim. For example:
Fascinating bit: Some 1932 researches studied what raises and lowers a person's heart rate and discovered that "'defecating' can briefly bring your heart rate down by eight beats per minute." Who knew? Forget yoga, folks. Just eat more fiber.
Hilarious bit: "Watson's fame, in no small part, derives from his willingness to study human behavior in a laboratory setting. Most of his subjects were children, most notably Little Albert (no relation to Fat), the eleven-month-old boy in whom he conditioned a fear of white rats."
FYI, Roach's book is not one you can leave lying around the house, and I was almost afraid to have it on my library checkout record. I am a pastor's wife, after all. But I can only read so much titillating, guilty-pleasure material before returning to my map books. There are no fake-penis cameras in McCullough, but the Brooklyn Bridge isn't without charm. Who knew that Washington Roebling, the engineer who headed up its construction, had something of a Forrest Gump career in the Civil War, johnny-on-the-spot at many key battles? For a New York and Civil War fan like me, this is delicious. Why read about how the Roeblings got their kids if we can talk about how WR got the bends, deep beneath the East River?
How about you? Maps or sex?
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